"I remember asking, 'Are my balls on fire?' The entire room erupted in laughter."

I'm an Associate Editor on BuzzFeed's Pop Culture team who spends my days fangirling over all my favorite TV shows and movies.

"He played video games for hours, sweating and oily, wearing dirty clothes with his dirty hair, sitting on a dirty chair. He got a bump on his tailbone, ignored it, but it grew and grew until he couldn’t sit. Got scared and went to the ER, and they prepped him for removal/surgery before it could go septic. As his dirty, bare butt was up in the air waiting to be prepped, the doctor asked if he would mind if some students came in to view his wound. Not thinking clearly, he said yes, and a half dozen young med students walked in, including a couple of very pretty women. The doctor said to the students that it was likely a small wound or pimple to start, but the lack of proper hygiene resulted in a dangerous situation on the base of his spine. Hearing this and knowing that those pretty women saw his dirty, unkempt butt crack with a baseball-sized pus ball...it rocked his world into making things better."

"I was sent to their medpoint office, and the old doctor was highly curious about my appearance, and I told him why, smiling. When he walked me to the receptionist, there were several young female nurses hanging out as well, and he told them all, 'Don't get any ideas with him, I think he may be gay.' Their jaws drop, their eyes wide open, and I am belly laughing at the scene... they then scold him about talking like that, and then he tells them about my toes and genitals. I smoothed it over, told them I wasn't offended, he's just due to retire..."

"My mom's face turned ashen white, and I'm pretty sure her jaw hit the floor. He paused, finger still inside, for 5–10 seconds, looked at me and said: 'This is going to be a fun 30 or so weeks, isn't it?'"

Responses have been edited for length/clarity.