"He yelled, 'Ladies, I am so sorry!' as he let a 10-second-long deflating-balloon-sounding fart that felt like it rattled windows."

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"Preparing a syringe with numbing solution, he took my left nut and said, 'You’re gonna feel a little prick.' And I said, 'So are you, doc!' His nurse was rolling on the floor laughing her ass off, and then he realized what I just said, and he started laughing his ass off. They thanked me for having a sense of humor and said that they had never laughed that hard in a long time."

"All around the whole office, a needle full of MMR flapping in my bicep. The doctor, my mother, and the nurse all chased me around the whole practice until the nurse finally got the chance to tackle me like a linebacker, and then removed the needle. The worst part of this was that I still needed the vaccine for school and sports, so I had to get the shot anyway. The nurse had to prep a second shot and give it to me, probably with a little extra oomph for being such a jerk. I deserved it, if she didn’t. I won’t ever forget that hot mess. I’m sure my physician won’t, either. He’s still a pediatrician and now sees my son as a patient. The doctor was sure to tell my kid all about how ridiculous his mom behaved when she got her MMR shot."

Responses have been edited for length/clarity.