buzzfeed Press
Therapists, Psychologists, And Other Mental Health Experts Are Sharing "Red Flags" To Look For In The First Six Months Of A Relationship
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"It seems so nice, but it's just a way to get you to depend on them and turn a blind eye on the things that they really want to do." I’m an award-winning writer and editor living in New York City, where I currently work at BuzzFeed as the Senior Lifestyle Editor. Note: This post contains mentions of abuse. —Anonymous, 55, Virginia, Psychotherapist —Anonymous, 30, New York, Clinical Psychologist —Treasure Wilde, 40, Michigan, Therapist "For example, one person wants to find the right person and settle down; the other is planning on attending school in another state and is not looking for a long-term commitment — someone is going to get their heart broken. People just need to take a step back and honestly look at what they have in a new relationship and listen to their gut." —Anonymous, 49, Washington, Licensed Mental Health Counselor 4. You seem to always plan the dates, and prioritize spending time together while they leave you feeling like an afterthought. 5. They have mental health issues they are not addressing or working on or maybe even deny. This includes drug or alcohol issues. 6. One or both of their parents is overly involved in their life. This could mean there is little room left for a relationship that might require significantly more time and commitment down the road." —Dr. Shana, 46, Texas, Marriage and Family Therapist/Trauma Therapist —Anonymous, 30, New York, Clinical Psychologist Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.