"She definitely couldn't relate to others who couldn't afford things like vacations, new cars, or new houses."

I'm a New York City-based Staff Writer who enjoys covering lifestyle, relationships, and women's content.

"It wasn't that they were irresponsible or bad people. It's just that the risk profile of their life was completely different, and that shapes how you think about everything from careers to relationships to taking chances. This is probably the biggest, least-talked-about reason people stay middle-class or poor. It's daunting to take a big swing when the cost of missing is bankruptcy or homelessness. Best just keep going to work every day."

"She thought nothing of just randomly going to Belize for a few months or moving coasts or really doing anything that, for anyone else, would be bringing up the question 'how am I going to afford this?' As far as I know, she's still not employed full-time despite having a relatively in-demand, high-performing, and well-paying degree, and aside from 'keeping face,' it's embarrassing. However, it still doesn't stop her from going wherever or doing whatever she wants. Meanwhile, if I were underemployed, I'd be on a rice-and-beans diet. 

Actually, I did learn something: She was never forced to perform by circumstances, so she never bothered; she does things that she finds fun, and I do things that bring in income. She gets infinite throws at the proverbial balloon toss of life, and she can lackadaisically toss the darts over her shoulder and eventually find great success. I had to sit and aim for hours just to hit moderate success."

"Also, since they can afford whatever they want, we've discovered that unique homemade or sentimental gifts really stand out to them at Christmas or on birthdays. For example, they paid for a big family cruise last year. So for Christmas, we compiled all the photos, printed them out, and put them in a nice photo album. We also included some homemade coupons for a variety of quality time activities (hiking, going to the movies, going to the zoo, making them dinner, etc.). I think our gift brought a tear to their eye. They seemed to be incredibly touched by it. I guess what I'm saying is that although I can't connect with them on a financial level, I can still connect with them on other levels that they seem to appreciate."

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